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Keep the Faith: A dialogue with 5 College aged +/- women.

9/7/2017

6 Comments

 


​Keep the Faith: A dialogue with 5 College aged +/- women.

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​How do you gather 5 women together? Off them Free FroYo, Yo.

​It was the summer of ‘99 at a Catholic retreat when I was the lone teen boy in a small group with seven other girls. It. Was. Awesome.
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We named our group, “7 girls, a boy, and a Lake” after the then popular TV show “2 Guys, a girl and a pizza place”.
Sisterhood is an awful thing to lack. Community is essential when maintaining a strong relationship with the Lord.
Other than at most of my former Diocesan Directors of Religious Education gatherings, I hadn’t talked exclusively with a small group of women in a while. And when I say talk it’s essentially listen, empathize, affirm, and nod.  

Sisterhood is an awful thing to lack. Community is essential when maintaining a strong relationship with the Lord. Here are some Biblical Examples:
  • Mary ran to her relative Elizabeth in times of distress. (1:39-35)
  • Naomi and Ruth rely on each other when all they have each is other to get through famine and loss. (Ruth 1:2)
  • Martha, although she gets a bad rap comparing her to her sister Mary for not “choosing the better part” (Luke 10:42), Martha is the one who runs to Jesus when her brother Lazarus has died and implores his help. Martha acts while Mary stays at home (John 11:20)
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So how could I not help connect these women that I know from various ministries with each other? 

“FAB 5” BIOS:
  1. College student from a state university who lives in a Catholic household.
  2. College student from a Catholic university who finished serving as a summer missionary.
  3. Recent college graduate from a state university who was involved in a college ministry and is beginning a year of mission at another university.
  4. Catholic university graduate who is serving in a parish as a paid staff minister and is discerning religious life
  5. Catholic university graduate who recently served internationally and is discerning religious life.
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THE QUESTIONS:

If you could go back to your 15 year old self and tell her something, what would it be?
  • There are men who want to push you to Heaven, find them!
  • God has a plan, don’t hyperventilate.
  • God is not a feeling. God wants a personal relationship with you.
  • God is mercy. I wish I could have understood more about His mercy.
  • I feel that I “knew” everything to do but wouldn’t have followed what I believe. Now I’d say, it’s worth the doing what I instinctively knew.
  • Always keep the perspective that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. It will get better.
  • These girls (and guys) are so luck to have a retreat like Echoes of Worth. I wish I had it when I was a teen, it would have changed my life.
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How does social media influence your life? What are ways to work with it?
  • Detach from it.
  • The more you use it the more you care about it til all you care about is it. Don’t do that.
  • I do a media fast every Friday to not let it control me.
  • It kept increasing negative thoughts within me especially after college as everyone was showing off their new successes and achievements and I was still unsure and discerning what to do. We can get caught up on the cycle of comparison like, “oh my job isn’t good enough”, or “why am I living back at my parents house”, or “it looks like their salary is higher than mine”.
  • Most of what people post are shallow. Which is fine but be sure to speak and connect with others not only on shallow platforms.
  • I found myself having to “up my game” for each post making it wittier, funnier, or more liked. I was longing for Godly satisfaction but seeking it on social media and I came up empty.
  • Social media can be a great tool to stay connected to friends but only use it as a connection not as a lifeline.
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How do you make time for silence?
  • I journal, a lot!
  • I do a daily holy hour in front of the blessed Sacrament. What was required of me because of “my job” has now become something I can’t live without.
  • Find or create a reading plan and stick to it. Most of us don’t complete books when there is no plan to it.
If there was one thing that Catholic Church could do for you it is...?
  • Offer more adoration availabilities (3x)
  • Have more daily Mass in the evenings. One place I know has it at 10pm each night! That's when college students start going out (2x)
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All of these sisters in Christ have come to know the Lord and are open to Jesus’ path for their life. They’re constantly praying about their Vocations from God to the consecrated, religious, or married life. The Lord’s grace has moved within each of them differently yet each places herself in an environment to receive that grace. They “put in the time” to work on their relationship with the Lord, the Church, and those outside of the Church. Some of these women have lost parents, have parents who are divorced, or who have parents who don’t understand their faith and call to ministry. These women find comfort and deep assurance that they are daughters of God.

Teens: If you aspire to be close the Lord when you’re their age follow their advice.
College Students [Ladies]: Find community or make community with face-to-face other women and grow in holiness together.
College Students [Guys]: Find ways in which you can push ladies into Heaven.
Parents: Pray for your children and perhaps share this short article with them. As always, turn to the Sacred Scriptures for some advice on how women responded in faith.

Additional Resources:
  • St. Pope John Paul II’s works on the “Dignity & Vocation of Women”.  
  • Blessed Is She ministry for women: www.blessedisshe.com
  • Life Teen Catholic youth ministry blog and videos: www.lifeteen.com 



​by Andrew Brown

I write when I have free time. However, working for the Lord and His Church makes it nearly impossible to have free time.

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Bay Area Attendees at the TOB Congress

12/20/2016

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Theology of the Body Congress attended by local Young Adults & Adults.

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17 young adults and adults attend the TOB Congress. Many are from ministries & organizations such as Youth & Young Adult Ministries from the Diocese of San Jose, Goretti Group, TOBDC, Echoes of Worth, Courage/EnCourage, & the RISE Conference. 
For the first time ever, the Theology of the Body Institute brought its expertise to Southern California this past Sept. 23 -25, where over 850 Catholics flooded the Ontario Convention Center 2016 Theology of the Body Congress. This year’s Congress theme was “Love, Mercy and the Gift of the Family”.

Essential topics for the modern Catholic were covered throughout the weekend by speakers like Monsignor J. Brian Bransfield, Sr. Regina Gorman, Matthew Fradd, and Archbishop Salvatore Cordileone of San Francisco. According to Damon Owens, Theology of the Body Congress Chair, “Given the unprecedented challenges for our youth, marriages and families today, it’s particularly important for us as believers to gather to hear the great truths of our faith unfiltered by the media.” So what has Theology of the Body done for its participants? Klarissa Chichioco, Youth Ministry Coordinator at Queen of Apostles (Coordinator of Programming fro EoW) says, “Thanks to the Theology of the Body, I am open to receive the gift of God's love, and free to give it to others. It is a holy and authentic exchange.”

"It was as if Jesus reached out and touched each heart, calling us to the fulfillment of our each and every desire, and laying the groundwork on how we may obtain it" said Christian Amalu, a young adult from Our Lady of Peace. Over 30 presentations were given during the Congress weekend covering everything from Catholic family life to feminism in the Church to the cultural and personal threat of pornography. Speakers answered questions like “How is John Paul II’s Theology of the Body important to understanding the ministry of Pope Francis?” and “How can couples preparing for Marriage Prep learn the beauty of Natural Family Planning?”

“Especially in light of the Year of Mercy and the recent exhortation Amoris Latetia, TOB Congress interweaved the rich teachings of our Catholic faith with high regard for each individual person we encounter” said Andrew Brown, Pastoral Associate at St. Lucy parish (Exec. dir. for EoW). Marciano De Souza, parishioner of Our Lady of Peace and the Goretti Group leader shared the presentations were "Mind-blowing! All the best speakers in the world on this topic in one place. I would highly recommend going next year." Diocese of San Jose Associate for Campus Ministry to San Jose State University, Mary Gandeza, spoke, “The Theology of the Body Congress is truly one of the most formative conferences I have attended. I would encourage people to learn more about the beautiful mystery of God's will and creation.”

One of the guest presenters at the TOB Congress, Katrina Zeno, also came to the Diocese of San Jose on November 5, 2016. Zeno serves in the Diocese of Phoenix as the Coordinator of Integration for TOB within all of its Catechesis for children to adults. More info. about that event forthcoming. 
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For more information on the 2017 Theology of the Body Congress, visit www.tobCongress.com.
Editor's Note: This article was originally written in October and submitted to the Valley Catholic for publishing.
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College Students and Parents: How to limit the holiday home tension.

12/16/2016

6 Comments

 
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​“I’ll be home for Christmas….
unless I’m hanging out with my friends that I haven’t seen since high school because I'm going out late with them or I'm playing Xbox live til 3am and then sleeping in so you’ll never see me.”

Part I for College students/young adults: How to deal with the parents after living the college/young adult lifestyle.

Part II (forthcoming) for Parents: How to deal with your young adult children now that they’re back from college, work, coming up from the downstairs basement.

Here’s some things I’ve learned from experience, observation, and conversation: I’m starting with the college kids first because they don’t read the end of blogs/posts:
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College Students:
  1. Mind your P’s and Q’s: you aren’t used to having people care for you, serve you, and love you like your folks. Begin your sentences with “please” and end it with “thank you”. Especially when they volunteer to fold your laundry.

  2. Do chores, and don’t expect an allowance: I used to have a boss that said, “I show you that I appreciate you every two weeks with a paycheck”. Although he was being sarcastic it holds some truth. Be grateful. Do some work around the house and no complaining about it. Your parents likely co-signed your school loan, are giving you the keys to their car, or tapped into their retirement for your fancy educational institutional advancements. Help your old-man with some “able-bodied” strength with the Christmas lights or the tree. Offer to wrap gifts or bake items with your Mom. It’ll go a long way.

  3. Go with your folks to Church: Your intro to Philosophy teacher has made you question everything good about any religion but don’t project that onto your family values, sacred traditions, and authentic spirituality. Those values made you who you are and have instilled graces that you need now but perhaps won’t realize it til you’ve aged a little more. Don’t forget the Commandments, “Keep the Sabbath” and “Honor your Father and Mother”. Oh wait, they’re merely “suggestions” now ; )

    In all seriousness, I’ve seen many college students return grateful, peaceful, and happy after they go to church with their family. There’s a deep connection with God that occurs within the walls of His house. Don’t sell it short. You’ll be blessed by it!


  4. Communicate: You report to no one and you do your own thing. We get that. Having common courtesy is often forgotten so you may need to train yourself to say, not just in your head but aloud and preferably to your parents “I’m going out and I’ll be back in two hours”. This makes a huge difference vs. getting the keys and saying, “bye”. Perhaps Aunt Meredtih is coming over for dinner that night and your folks forgot to tell you. Maybe your cousin is making a surprise visit and Mom and Dad want need to know when you’ll be back.

  5. Pick up the phone and text Your Mom- she still worries about you: Although no curfew exists you should still try and be home at a decent hour and/or text her that you’re at Denny’s and not passed out in some dark alley. She’ll still sleep with one eye open but at least she knows your safe.

  6. Put down the phone and have an adult conversation: Conversation, dialogue, people listening without interruptions is such a rarity today. Only if you’re on retreat or between 3am-6am is your phone mostly silent. (Mostly b/c of @pontifex Tweets). Guess what, you can ask your parents to do the same. You’ll be amazed at how fluid, deep, and fun talking to them can be. Here are some questions for you to ask them:

    How are you? What’s new in life? What are you doing in your spare time without me around?
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  7. It’s still their house, their rules: You may want to bring your new beau or belle over and introduce them to the fam-bam. Don’t be foolish to think that if you’re cohabiting with them elsewhere you can do so under your parent’s roof. Moral behavior isn’t subject to age or circumstance. Don’t put your parents in a moral dilemma because of your manner of living. They want you to be happy, yes, but they also want you to be holy. As I tell many engaged couples in marriage prep, "no ding-ding without the ring-ring". If you can’t deal with it, get a hotel and pay for it on your own.   

I hope these help. Please share and care. Papa Frank, Pope Francis in “Joy of the Family writes, “The family is also a sign of Christ. It manifests the closeness of God who is a part of every human life, since he became one with us through his incarnation, death and resurrection.” Enjoy your families and Merry Christmas!

What are some tips or tricks you have to make holiday-home tension minimal?
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    AUTHORS:

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    Justin Read is a graduate student at the Augustine Institute and studying abroad at the Pontifical University of John Paul II in Krakow, Poland. He has served EoW since 2017. He graduated from Santa Clara University with a B.S. Computer Science, 2018.
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    Andrew Brown,
    Executive Director

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